The Carolyn Hax chat can include inside jokes, abbreviations and references to years-old stories, but don’t feel left out! Here are some of the terms you may come across. This list will be updated (suggestions welcome).
AITA: Refers to the Reddit forum, “Am I the A******?”
Bonus kid — A stepchild
CH — Carolyn Hax
DH — Dear husband
DIL — Daughter-in-law
FIL — Father-in-law
FOO — Family of origin
Fox — Sounds like a specific curse word
FWIW — For what it’s worth
Gaslighting — From the 1944 movie“Gaslight,” about a wife tricked into doubting herself on such basic things that she just defers to her controlling husband.
Glassbowl — A person who is being a jerk. Think about what not-so-nice word glassbowl rhymes with.
Hamster Wheel of Despair — Also Dating Hamster Wheel of Despair or DHWD. From a 2007 column, describing a recurring cycle of unhappy behavior.
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Head to keyboard — An action of sheer exasperation
Hoot — Also Hootenanny. Annual chat events where we share our horror stories from the holidays or from wedding season.
IIRC: If I recall correctly
JFC, JTC, etc.: [Jiminy] [Middle name] [Cricket]
LW — Letter writer
MIL — Mother-in-law
MOB — Mother of the bride
MOH — Maid of honor
Nibling — A gender-neutral term for a child of one’s siblings
Nuts — Also nutterati. The dedicated readers who comment regularly on the column. Replaces the problematic “peanut gallery.”
Online only — A request that some chatters make when submitting questions to prevent them from appearing in print. We try to honor “online only” requests, but because of the volume of questions coming in, we don’t always see them.
OP — Original poster
SIL: Son-in-law or sister-in-law
Singing goats — A favorite companion soundtrack to the Holiday Hootenanny
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SO — Significant other
TL;DR — Too long; didn’t read. Often used in front of a short summary of a long story.
YMMV — Your mileage may vary
Here are some classic stories from the Hootenanny that are often referenced:
Bacon pants — This is one of those phrases that just kind of stuck and became all-purpose. Here’s the 2001 chat where it originated.
Celery man — A reference to a vegetable centerpiece mentioned in a Holiday Hootenanny story. Here’s the 2020 chat where it originated.
Death chair — This one is from a holiday story about a family whose holiday table includes an unlucky “death chair” and is another phrase that just stuck. Here’s the 2000 chat where it originated.
Exploding tequila turkey — A Holiday Hootenanny story that delivers on its promise. See the 2010 chat where it originated. See also, the exploding ham of 2016.
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Martin Van Buren — The eighth president of the United States and a reference to a memorable Holiday Hootenanny story. See the 2017 chat where it originated.
Naked Susan — Arguably the reigning queen of Holiday Hootenanny stories. See the 2018 chat where it originated here. Read the update on the charades clue here.
Reindeer poop award — Deer poop that has been dried out, shellacked and mounted to a plaque. See the story from the 2000 Holiday Hootenanny here.
Stuffing incident of 2015 — A 2015 Holiday Hootenanny story about the importance of stuffing. Read an update here.
This list was updated to include new terms.
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